Butterflies in Honey (Growing Pains #3) Read online

  When they were done, they sat on the sand, side by side, watching the sun sink.

  “You are better, you’re right,” Krista admitted.

  Sean grinned. “You aren’t.”

  Krista laughed and bumped him with her shoulder. She saw his full lips curl at the corners and his eyes crinkle in the fading light.

  “Are you still surfing?” Sean asked, looking at the horizon.

  “Yup. My arms don’t hurt as much, but I don’t stay out for nearly as long, either.”

  “You are pretty good. You learned really fast.”

  “Thanks. But it’s easier to learn when you don’t spend all your strength paddling.”

  “Still.”

  They were silent for a spell. Krista could smell his sweat and unique scent. She closed her eyes and breathed it in.

  “I’m sorry about the other morning. I was bitchy,” he admitted.

  Krista kept silent. It was true. And it hurt. Another thing she wouldn’t admit.

  They were quiet for a long time, darkness rushing in to steal their last moments together. Soon they would leave the beach; Krista would go back to her hotel room and Sean would go home. She doubted they would see each other again. He obviously didn’t want to see her, and she didn’t want to face that fact. Even now, in the fading light, sitting on a relaxed beach after working out together, he seemed uncomfortable. It was like he’d forgotten how to relax in her presence.

  Making a decision, she figured she might as well drive the nail in the coffin.

  “Do you ever think of me, Sean?”

  He was silent for a long time. Debating. Then, “Yes.”

  The way he said yes, Krista knew that regardless of what happened, at least she wasn’t alone in missing him. He thought of her, too. He might not want to keep up whatever they’d had, or be confronted with it as he was now, but even though they had only had something for a short time all those years ago, they had something once. Something strong.

  “Do you…” Sean hesitated. Again debated. “Do you ever think of me?” He asked it so quietly that it was nearly lost on the breeze.

  She wasn’t bashful about answering. “Every day.”

  Sean was very still beside her. Disbelieving. Krista wasn’t even sure he was breathing.

  “I probably shouldn’t have admitted that,” she muttered quietly. It was true. She would never want Chet to find out her feelings for Sean never went away. That she still loved him with all her heart and didn’t think that was liable to change any time soon, if ever.

  “No. Probably not,” Sean said cryptically.

  “If only things had been different. Jim is still messing up my life.”

  Sean sighed as the darkness consumed the last of the fire on the horizon.

  They passed into silence. Neither really knew what to say. There was really nothing to say. His life was in San Francisco, or wherever his job was, and Krista’s was in L.A. With the last of the light dipping behind the horizon, there wasn’t any other reason to stall. Krista had to respect Sean’s decision—not cling to the past like she had been—and finally move on.

  “Well, I’m going to head out,” she said, standing up, doing her best to keep the tears from her eyes.

  Sean stood up with her. “I’m going to hang out a minute.”

  He stepped to her, his body inches away. She looked up at his intense eyes, the color lost to the night. She got a moment of panic, thinking he would kiss her. She didn’t think she could turn him down. She didn’t want to turn him down. She’d never cheated before in her life, not thinking much of those that did, but if Sean asked… she wouldn’t say no. Not to him.

  He saw the concern on her face and spared her the decision. He hugged her close, needing contact. “I want you to be happy, baby. Whatever decisions you make, I just want you to be happy. Okay? Promise me?”

  Krista was consumed. This was the final goodbye. He would move away somewhere and she wouldn’t even know how to find him.

  Tears were running down her face. She clutched him tight and clung to his chest. “When I was here I was happy, Sean. Really happy.”

  Sean kissed the top of her head. They stood that way for a long time—hugging each other close, not wanting to let go. Not wanting to admit that the last page of the book had been written, and the book finally, after all this time, had to be shut for good.

  Finally Sean’s arms loosened, and he let go.

  Krista backed up, sniffling like a child. “Take care of yourself, Sean.”

  He watched the love of his life walk away. For the second time.

  “The end,” Krista muttered into the emptiness of the night.

  Chapter Six

  The phone started to ring. Sean put down his pen and rubbed his eyes. His life was nothing but stress these days. It had been three months since he said goodbye to Krista for the second, and final, time. He’d told everyone around him that if he heard her name, he would immediately walk out of the room. His house was sold and in escrow without him having found another. He’d given his notice to Dexico and was wrapping things up.

  He had also turned Tory down. Repeatedly. He didn’t want to work anywhere he might see Krista. Not even in the same town, much less the same company. In another three weeks, he’d have no job and no house. He didn’t have a clue what he would do, and he didn’t really care. Start over, probably. Maybe move to Hawaii. Take a year off, maybe. Hopefully meet someone new. Probably not even bother.

  Sean picked up the phone. “McAdams.”

  “Sean.” It was Tory again. The man was the most persistent person Sean had ever met.

  “Hi Tory. It’s still a no.”

  “I am not calling to offer you a job—though, of course, the position is still open and I will gladly offer it when you’ve come to your senses.”

  Sean wasn’t in the mood to smile. “I don’t really feel like spending eighteen holes repeating myself, Tory. And I certainly don’t want to see Ben’s latest painting.”

  “You do, actually; it is his best yet. I bought it for my daughter. The young man is in love, I believe. His piece shows it perfectly—very sweet. He was too embarrassed for his girlfriend to see it. Although, she would have wanted to have it, I am sure.”

  “Uh huh.” Sean pinched the bridge of his nose.

  “Anyway, Emily has asked that I pass this on to you. She seemed adamant about it. She was convinced you would want to know.”

  “Sure,” Sean said, looking out the window. Arguing wouldn’t make Tory go away—not when Emily was behind it.

  “Well, Emily has heard from Ben, upon procuring the painting, that Miss Marshall—excuse me, Miss Fields—is single again.”

  Time and space contorted around Sean’s office. The phone became his lifeline to reality. He gripped the hard plastic as if someone was trying to rip it away from his head.

  He shouldn’t care. It shouldn’t mean anything. It had been three months since he’d said goodbye to Krista for the second time. Three months meant her breakup had nothing to do with him.

  Tory continued into the silence. “Yes, it seems she was a whirlwind of activity when she returned from San Francisco. She moved her friends to L.A., got one of them a job immediately—the other is now employed with me, too, I believe—redecorated her house, and broke up with her boyfriend. I believe breaking up with her boyfriend was first, however. Then redecorating. Emily has the specifics.”

  Sean felt stupid asking, but he couldn’t help it. “Is she seeing anyone else?”

  “My Emily is always right, it seems. Don’t tell her I said that. As far as Emily knows, no, she is not dating right now.”

  Sean slowly blew out his breath. “Can I call you back?”

  “Certainly. You have the number.”

  Sean hung up amid swirls of color. Before he could get his bearings, he called the one person he knew would have all the information.

  “Well hello, stranger!” Marcus sang merrily as he answered the phone.

  “Marcus
.” Sean calmed himself. “Hi. Listen, uh…”

  Sean continually felt stupid. He should have approached this differently. He couldn’t just call up another dude and ask straight-up girl gossip.

  Luckily, Marcus read into the call. “Yes, she’s single. I would have told you, but you have that ban and all.”

  Sean’s whole body was tingling. “Did you talk to her about it?”

  “Of course I did! Shall I just assume you want to know the deets?”

  “Uh…”

  “I’ll take that as a straight-man’s yes. A week after she got back from San Francisco she had dinner with him and broke it off. As far as I know, he was the first to know. She didn’t discuss it with anyone. Not that she had to. He was a bit dopey. Hot, yes, but you couldn’t listen to him. Double dates were painful!”

  “And she’s not seeing anyone else?”

  “Ban on dating. She’s been asked out constantly, and I mean constantly, but so far she’s always said no. Although, she hasn’t had sex in forever. She’ll probably bend, soon. She’s getting bitchy.”

  “A week after she got back?”

  “Tit-for-tat. Did you two do the nasty while she was there? Judy thinks you must have or else Krista wouldn’t have broken it off right away. Ben says no way, though. Apparently Krista doesn’t like cheaters—her giant ex-boyfriend is the reason behind that, of course. Kate and Jasmine agree with Ben.”

  “No, we didn’t. I didn’t touch her. I didn’t see much of her for fear I would touch her.”

  “Really? You still like her, then? Kate thinks you don’t because of how you pushed her away. Also how you acted in San Fran. Jasmine thinks you—“

  “Yes, I still love her.”

  Marcus took a noisy breath. “Well, then. You’ve got quite a hole to dig yourself out of. It’s been a long time.”

  “Yeah, listen Marcus, I gotta go. Keep it under wraps that I talked to you, will ya? I don’t want Krista thinking I am gossiping about her.”

  “Then how did you find out? Kate and Jasmine decided to keep it from Cassie.”

  That explained why Cassie wasn’t on his butt about it, but he wasn’t sure it was good news. Krista took real stock in what her friends thought. She listened to them. If they were against Sean, he wouldn’t have a chance to get her back. And he had to get her back. His life didn’t make sense without her.

  “Tory called. Listen, I have to go. I’ll talk to you soon.”

  Sean paced around his office for a minute and thought. He took stock of his life, of his choices, and now of a path reopened to him. He called Cassie next, needing to be sure.

  “Hey,” she said when she picked up.

  “Krista is single. She broke up with her boyfriend a week after getting back to L.A..”

  The other end was silent. Sean looked at his cell phone to make sure it was still on, then into the live call said, “Hello?”

  “You promised.”

  Sean let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding and half laughed. “Yes.”

  “So now what?”

  “Want to move to L.A. with me?”

  ~*~*~*~

  Six months had gone by since Krista’s San Francisco visit. They hadn’t taken Sean’s account, and Krista hadn’t seen him since that night on the beach. She heard he quit Dexico, sold his house—apparently to Cassie--and moved away. No one knew what company he moved to, or even what location. He was a ghost.

  Dexico was in the midst of crumbling from the inside out. Apparently John was shocked Sean moved on; he hadn’t seen it coming. In fact, no one had. When Sean gave his notice, John did everything he could to entice Sean to stay. Marcus said the salary and perks being thrown at him were staggering. Not only that, but the President offered him a VP title. He would share the role with John. Nothing would keep him, though. He worked hard for his last month, gave his stuff to the other salesmen, and closed another book in San Francisco. Ray had left shortly thereafter.

  The good news was, Kate and Jasmine decided to go to L.A. They said they had nothing better to do, and needed a change of scenery. Judy had gotten another job, too. Everyone from their old team evaporated. The company wasn’t nearly as loyal as she first believed, and it showed in their turnover.

  Even Cassie agreed to move, eventually. Eventually being the key word. She was with a great company in a great job, so she had to transfer within the company, and right now there weren’t any openings in L.A. in her field. But the rain check was good enough for Krista and friends. She was a solid, though distant, member of their group.

  Although, Krista would be lying if she said she was the one that kept her in the circle. Kate and Jasmine took up that mantle. Cassie was Krista’s only link left to Sean, and his rejection hurt so much, she couldn’t face Cassie without the pain of it consuming her. And it seemed like Cassie knew it, too, because they’d talked once on the phone—Cassie had called for a friendly chat—and Krista broke down in tears ten minutes in. It was slightly embarrassing. Especially since Cassie didn’t have any excuses for her brother’s behavior.

  Cassie had ended the call saying to call her when Krista could stomach her humor. Krista laughed through her pain, but hadn’t dialed her number since. If only her humor was the problem.

  Kate was hired on in Krista’s department. She was better qualified, so Jasmine got to lounge around at Krista’s house and look for work. That lasted a couple months until she found employment in another part of Kate and Krista’s company. A word from Krista, and a whirlwind of chat from Marcus, and she was in before she even interviewed.

  It helped that Tory heard the girls were the back-up researchers when Krista was with Dexico. He’d asked how well they worked together. Krista had answered that they were her dream team before she’d even met Marcus and Ben. He nodded once and then changed the subject, which meant he planned to think it over.

  Whichever it was, Tory, Marcus, or Krista—or maybe all of the above—Jasmine got in with a good salary, and they were all together again.

  It was a perfect day of spring in Los Angeles and Krista was trapped indoors looking at some specs. Marcus came in. “Geegee.”

  “Marcus,” she said as she leaned back. “What’s today’s news?”

  “No news. I came to walk to the meeting with you. Ben said he’d meet us there. He was in the middle of some nerdery or something.”

  “Oh crap! Is that today?”

  “Yes.” Marcus sighed, extremely put out. “C’mon.”

  “What would I do without you?” Krista got a notepad and pen.

  “Get fired because you failed to show up to all the meetings.”

  “Probably.”

  They got to the large meeting hall. There was a hum of conversation as they took their seats. The raised platform in the front of the hall was empty. Krista checked her watch, which was a nasty habit of late. It seemed she was always late for something, or things always took longer than they were supposed to. It was rude to do in presentations—she needed to stop. It was worse than sighing all the time.

  Speaking of, she had almost kicked that habit. Jasmine started carrying around a squirt bottle—which Marcus thought was hilarious—and squirted people when they sighed. The one exception was her boss, but it was only a matter of time.

  Finally, the speaker came to the podium. It was Tory.

  “Did you know about this?” Krista asked Marcus.

  Tory usually let Krista know when he would be in the area. He always had things to teach her, or show her, or work for her to do. She was a working intern, if it came right down to it. But she benefited from it, and then so did he. Her department was churning out work better than any other of their counterparts, worldwide. To date, they had never failed to spot a bad egg. Not once.

  Another perk was that when he brought Emily with him, Krista got to leave early. They shopped and gossiped and had girl time. Work was not brought up, as a rule. Krista looked forward to those visits. Even though she now had Kate and Jasmine, there was som
ething special about Emily. Somehow, despite their age gap, Emily completely got her. She always picked up what Krista put down, and then ran with it.

  Marcus shook his head and looked around. “It probably isn’t all that big. It’s about time for a company update.”

  “Good morning L.A. branch. Thank you all for joining us,” Tory started.

  “As if we had a choice,” Kate said from behind Krista and Marcus.

  Krista looked back to her with a warning. Kate was being rude and it would look poorly on Krista. Kate’s instructions were to save the rudeness for when Krista was not around. And then only go so far that she didn’t get in trouble.

  Ben and Jasmine were looking at the stage with bored expressions. Kate noticed Krista looking and grinned.

  “Nice of you to show up, boss,” she said snidely.

  Krista took the matter firmly in hand by sticking her tongue out.

  Before she could turn back around, Jasmine asked, “What are the plans for tonight? I need to get out, quick. My boss is trying to make me stay late. On a Friday!”

  It was then that the microphone blast out a deep baritone with a gravel rumble, the words gliding across the airwaves and splintering Krista’s brittle bones. She turned around so quickly she gave herself whiplash.

  Sean was standing on the stage, in the same room with her, next to Tory, in an expensive suit and a very handsome smile. He’d cut and styled his hair, was wearing one of Marco’s suits, and had shiny black shoes. He looked like a million bucks.

  And he was here. With Tory. In Krista’s company. In Krista’s town.

  After rejecting her in San Francisco.

  To describe what happened at that point would be impossible. The CliffsNotes were: Krista’s world was tilted in confusion, her stomach dropped ten feet and filled with a sudden swarm of killer bees, her ass clenched, her breath whooshed out of her body, her head went light, her vision went blurry, her body got hot, but broke out in shivers. She couldn’t process. She didn’t understand.